Friday, January 22, 2016

Funny Friday

Last night I went to the local Indian with a couple of mates.  We all found the food excellent so that’s as good a reason as any to select today’s Funny Friday theme: Indian food.


A customer is ordering food in an Indian restaurant.

"Waiter, what's this Chicken Tarka?"

The waiter replies, "it's the same as Chicken Tikka, but it's a little 'Otter."

* * * * * * * * * *

I didn’t understand the above joke until I looked into it and found that Tarka is the name of an Otter in a book.

From Wikipedia:
Tarka the Otter: His Joyful Water-Life and Death in the Country of the Two Rivers is a highly influential novel by Henry Williamson, first published in 1927 by G.P. Putnam's Sons with an introduction by the Hon. Sir John Fortescue. It won the Hawthornden Prize in 1928 and remains Willamson's best-known and most popular work, having never been out of print since first publication.  
As its title suggests, the novel describes the life of an otter, along with a detailed observation of its habitat in the country of the River Taw and River Torridge in North Devon (the "Two Rivers"); the name "Tarka" is said by Williamson to mean "Wandering as Water" (p. 10). 

I brought a date to my place last night.

I said, "I hope you like Indian food."

Surprised, she giggled, "Bit of a chef, are we?"

"No," I replied, "I got a take away last night and it's still under the bed."

I'd jokingly told my wife that I wanted a Lamborghini for my birthday.

When I got back from work on the big day, all I could smell was Indian food.

"I couldn't find a Lamb Borghini", she said,"... so I hope a Lamb Bhuna is OK.."

I called the local Indian to get some food delivered.

"Mixed pakora, lamb vindaloo with fried rice and two naan breads."

"That'll take about 45 minutes, sir," said the guy.

"Listen, mate," I said, "just you make sure it's here in five minutes and I'll decide myself how fast I eat."

I've decided to name my new curry "Frodo".

It destroys the ring in a fiery inferno after 10 painful hours.

I went for an Indian last night. The waiter came over and said, "Curry okay?"

I replied, "Go on then, one song then you can fuck off."


Corn Corner:

My girlfriend left me because I make too many bad puns and eat too much Indian food.

I guess I goat curry'd away...

A member of Patrick Swayze's family has admitted to the murder of the family’s Indian chef. Allegedly, the chef was going to put Swayze's ashes into a mild curry. A family member said the chef had been killed because, "Nobody puts Swayze in a korma."

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