Thought for the Day

Funny Friday

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Welcome to another Friday and some funnies, dear readers. Enjoy the weekend.

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A Macleans salesman was on the country run and found himself at a little store in the middle of nowhere. It was dusty, dirty, dilapidated and he didn’t fancy his chances of making a big sale. 

Nonetheless he went into his pitch, describing the wonders of Macleans, how the past worked miracles on your choppers. The store owner watched the performance impassively. Then he said “Look under my counter.” 

The salesman looked and saw shelves packed with Lady Scott tissue. 

“Now have a look in my cupboard.” 

The salesman looked and there was a mountain of Sorbent toilet tissue. 

“Now come and look out the back.” He took the salesman to a backyard shed\, opened the door and revealed mountains of Kleenex toilet tissue. 

“What’s that got to do with me selling toothpaste?” the salesman asked. 

“Simple. I’ve been running this store for 20 years. And if I can’t get the locals to wipe their bums, I’ve no hope of getting’ them to clean their bloody teeth.” 

__________ 

An old swaggie was trapped on the wrong side of a flooded river and, after a few weeks, ran out of food. He tried to stuff a jumbuck in his tuckerbag but the ground was so slippery he couldn’t catch one. So he had to kill his dog, a faithful pooch that had been his only companion for almost ten years. After he had eaten all the meat, he sat gazing sadly into his campfire and noticed how the flames were lighting bits of the dog’s skeleton. He said “My old dog would have liked them bones.” 

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From the vault: 

Angela Merkel sends Donald Trump a coded message to let him know she is still around: "370H SSV 0773H." Trump is baffled. The FBI can’t help, nor can the CIA, so they ask Britain's MI6 for help. Within a minute MI6 replies: "Tell the President he's holding the message upside down." 

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Limerick of the Week: 

There once was a lady of Maine 

Who declared she’d a man on the brain. 

But you knew from the view, 

Of her waist as it grew, 

It was not on her brain that he'd lain. 

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Gallery: 

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Corn Corner: 

__________

Roses are black, violets are black. Everything is black..... 

A poem by Stevie Wonder, aged 4 

__________

I’ve had issues with mixing my metaphors in the past, but I think I can finally see the carrot at the end of the tunnel. 

__________ 

Natalie Imbruglia is pregnant at 44 thanks to IVF. A bit old and inexperienced for a first pregnancy. Let's hope she gets seen by the midwife in plenty of time or it could be a case of: 

You're a little late, I'm already torn.

Quote for the Day

- From The Wolf of Wall Street

I read the news today, oh boy . . .

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An Australian icon has passed away: Margaret Fulton who died on July 24 2019 aged 94. 

According to Wikipedia: 

Margaret Isobel Fulton, OAM (6 October 1924 – 24 July 2019 was a Scottish-born Australian food and cooking 'guru', writer, journalist, author, and commentator. She was the first of this genre of writers in Australia. Her early recipes encouraged Australian housewives to alter the Australian staple of "meat and three vegetables" and to be creative with food. She 'discovered' international cuisine from exotic places such as Spain, Italy, India and China and as Cookery Editor, "brought these into Australian homes through her articles in the Woman's Day magazine". Fulton realised that chefs who did television shows tended to lose their audience. Accordingly, she remained a writer who regularly appeared only as a 'guest' on various television programs. 

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Margaret_Fulton

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While on the subject of deaths, American actor David Hedison passed away on July 18, 2019 aged 92. Fans may recall him as the actor who portrayed CIA agent Felix Leiter in the James Bond flicks Live and Let Die (1973) and Licence to Kill (1989). I have always associated his name with the Irwin Allen TV series Voyage to the Bottom of the Sea (1964-1968), in which he played Captain Lee Crane. 

Hedison in Voyage to See What’s on the Bottom, I mean to the Bottom of the Sea. 

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From: 

SBS News, 22 July 2019 

https://www.sbs.com.au/news/canadian-police-forget-to-turn-off-cat-filter-for-livestream-of-double-homicide-press-conference

Still dealing with death, two people have been murdered in British Columbia. The bodies of Australian Lucas Fowler and his American girlfriend, Chynna Noelle Deese, were found dead last Monday on the Alaska Highway, 20km south of Liard Hot Springs in British Columbia. What brought additional attention was that the Canadian police, while streaming a press conference about the double homicide, forgot to turn off a cat filter used to add cat ears, nose and whiskers. The result: 

Last month, Shaukat Yousafazi, a regional minister in northwest Pakistan, started a press conference without realizing that he too also had the cat filter turned on. Yousafazi went viral after he proceeded to talk about regional issues with cat ears and whiskers for the entirety of his press conference. 

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More crime . . . 

From: 

7news.com.au, July 23 2019 

https://7news.com.au/news/crime/van-carrying-200m-of-ice-crashes-into-police-cars-outside-eastwood-police-station-c-360674

“A 26-year-old driver is facing a lengthy jail term after crashing his van - filled with more than $200 million of the drug ice - into police cars parked out the front of a Sydney cop shop. NSW police say it is one of the "easiest" drugs busts ever made, and it would be fair to say the accused had a "very, very bad day". Just before 10.30am on Monday, the Toyota HiAce allegedly hit the parked police cars on Ethel Street in front of Eastwood Police Station. One of the police vehicles sustained significant damage, but no one was injured in the incident that was captured on CCTV. 

Officers inside the station say they heard a loud crash but, by the time they went to investigate, the driver had gone. About an hour later, a senior police officer spotted the van travelling south toward Ryde Bridge on Church St and stopped the vehicle. The driver's suspicious behaviour prompted the officer to search the vehicle, Detective Inspector Glen Baker told reporters on Tuesday. Inside the van was 13 boxes, each containing 21, one kilo bags of methylamphetamine. In total, police seized 273kg of ice, which has an estimated street value of more than $200 million.” 

See the video by clicking on: 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gPFXU8vVIa8

By the way, the driver was charged with drug offences, as well as negligent driving and fail to provide particulars. 

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Biscuits . . . 

From: 

ABC News, July 24 2019 

https://www.abc.net.au/news/2019-07-24/arnotts-sold-by-campbells-to-private-equity-group-kkr/11341190

"Arnott's biscuits, those staples of Australian cupboards, lunchboxes and tea trollies, have been passed on again — but not back into Australian hands. Campbell's soup company had owned Arnott's outright since 1997 and will sell it for $3.1b, according to media reports.

Arnott's can trace its heritage back 172 years to the arrival of a Scottish baker William Arnott who set up shop in the Maitland area before relocating to Hunter Street in Newcastle. By 1874 Mr Arnott had opened his first factory, marketing his robust Ships Biscuits to long haul sea voyages. The development of the Milk Arrowroot biscuit in 1882 saw Arnott's crack the Sydney market and the company become a national brand.

KKR has form, and a degree of notoriety, in the biscuit game, having organised a debt-fuelled buyout of Nabisco in 1988 for $44 billion, which was the largest leveraged buyout at the time. KKR's highest-profile Australian deal was the 2006 partnership with Kerry Stokes to take over the Seven Network, a venture it would sell out of seven years later at a loss.” 

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Actor Rutger Hauer has passed away, aged 75.  

Hauer (1944 – 2019) was a Dutch actor, writer, and environmentalist. He acted in both Dutch and English-language TV series and films.  His career began in 1969 with the title role in the Dutch television series Floris. His film credits include Flesh+Blood, Blind Fury, Blade Runner, The Hitcher, Escape from Sobibor (for which he won a Golden Globe Award for Best Supporting Actor), Nighthawks, Wedlock, Sin City, Confessions of a Dangerous Mind, Ladyhawke, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, The Osterman Weekend, The Blood of Heroes, Batman Begins, Hobo with a Shotgun, and The Rite.

"I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhäuser Gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. Time to die."

- Rutger Hauer as Roy Batty, Blade Runner.

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Quote for the Day

Poetry Corner:The Shooting of Dan McGrew

Another narrative poem, not Shakespeare but a rollicking good yarn nonetheless . . . 

The Shooting of Dan McGrew
BY ROBERT W SERVICE

A bunch of the boys were whooping it up in the Malamute saloon;

The kid that handles the music-box was hitting a jag-time tune;

Back of the bar, in a solo game, sat Dangerous Dan McGrew,

And watching his luck was his light-o'-love, the lady that's known as Lou.

When out of the night, which was fifty below, and into the din and the glare,

There stumbled a miner fresh from the creeks, dog-dirty, and loaded for bear.

He looked like a man with a foot in the grave and scarcely the strength of a louse,

Yet he tilted a poke of dust on the bar, and he called for drinks for the house.

There was none could place the stranger's face, though we searched ourselves for a clue;

But we drank his health, and the last to drink was Dangerous Dan McGrew.

There's men that somehow just grip your eyes, and hold them hard like a spell;

And such was he, and he looked to me like a man who had lived in hell;

With a face most hair, and the dreary stare of a dog whose day is done,

As he watered the green stuff in his glass, and the drops fell one by one.

Then I got to figgering who he was, and wondering what he'd do,

And I turned my head — and there watching him was the lady that's known as Lou.

His eyes went rubbering round the room, and he seemed in a kind of daze,

Till at last that old piano fell in the way of his wandering gaze.

The rag-time kid was having a drink; there was no one else on the stool,

So the stranger stumbles across the room, and flops down there like a fool.

In a buckskin shirt that was glazed with dirt he sat, and I saw him sway;

Then he clutched the keys with his talon hands — my God! but that man could play.

Were you ever out in the Great Alone, when the moon was awful clear,

And the icy mountains hemmed you in with a silence you most could hear;

With only the howl of a timber wolf, and you camped there in the cold,

A half-dead thing in a stark, dead world, clean mad for the muck called gold;

While high overhead, green, yellow and red, the North Lights swept in bars? —

Then you've a hunch what the music meant. . . hunger and night and the stars.

And hunger not of the belly kind, that's banished with bacon and beans,

But the gnawing hunger of lonely men for a home and all that it means;

For a fireside far from the cares that are, four walls and a roof above;

But oh! so cramful of cosy joy, and crowned with a woman's love —

A woman dearer than all the world, and true as Heaven is true —

(God! how ghastly she looks through her rouge, — the lady that's known as Lou.)

Then on a sudden the music changed, so soft that you scarce could hear;

But you felt that your life had been looted clean of all that it once held dear;

That someone had stolen the woman you loved; that her love was a devil's lie;

That your guts were gone, and the best for you was to crawl away and die.

'Twas the crowning cry of a heart's despair, and it thrilled you through and through —

"I guess I'll make it a spread misere", said Dangerous Dan McGrew.

The music almost died away ... then it burst like a pent-up flood;

And it seemed to say, "Repay, repay," and my eyes were blind with blood.

The thought came back of an ancient wrong, and it stung like a frozen lash,

And the lust awoke to kill, to kill ... then the music stopped with a crash,

And the stranger turned, and his eyes they burned in a most peculiar way;

In a buckskin shirt that was glazed with dirt he sat, and I saw him sway;

Then his lips went in in a kind of grin, and he spoke, and his voice was calm,

And "Boys," says he, "you don't know me, and none of you care a damn;

But I want to state, and my words are straight, and I'll bet my poke they're rue,

That one of you is a hound of hell. . .and that one is Dan McGrew."

Then I ducked my head, and the lights went out, and two guns blazed in the dark,

And a woman screamed, and the lights went up, and two men lay stiff and stark.

Pitched on his head, and pumped full of lead, was Dangerous Dan McGrew,

While the man from the creeks lay clutched to the breast of the lady that's known as Lou.

These are the simple facts of the case, and I guess I ought to know.

They say that the stranger was crazed with "hooch," and I'm not denying it's so.

I'm not so wise as the lawyer guys, but strictly between us two —

The woman that kissed him and — pinched his poke — was the lady that's known as Lou.

From: http://www.renegadetribune.com/shooting-dan-mcgrew/

by Mike Walsh

A banker’s son, Robert Service was born in Preston, Lancashire. Destined to be a bank clerk he went on to break the mould and became one of the great poet-troubadours of all time. 

When he was twenty-one years old Service travelled to Vancouver Island and British Columbia. From there he drifted around North America wandering from California and back to British Columbia. As he went on his merry and not so merry way he took several jobs to keep body and soul together. 

He went hungry in Mexico, lived in a Californian brothel, he farmed and he loved on Vancouver Island. In 1899, Service looked after a store in Cowichen Bay where he had his first verse published. These related to the Boer War. The March of the Dead brings to life the ghost army of dead that followed the triumphal victory parades: 

Of passing interest, Service’s brother Alick with Winston Churchill was among a batch of prisoners taken by the Boers. 

Service fell in love with the Yukon where from his pen the images flowed across the paper sheets. Caught up in the Klondike Gold Rush the essayist brought to life such exotic places as the frontier town named Whitehorse and the famous Whitehorse Rapids; Dawson City and the Yukon River. Mixing with prospectors who poured into the Yukon from the four corners of the earth Robert Service did more than soak the atmosphere up; he was part of it. 

One night, returning from a late night stroll, he heard the sounds of high spirits. Inspiration to write comes to me the same way. The words, “A bunch of the boys were whooping it up,” popped into his head. From that moment on the words of the epic poem, Dangerous Dan McGrew, were already being transcribed in the poet’s consciousness. Dashing to the bank where he worked he grabbed his pen and pad. Thus one of the world’s most famous poems was born. 

A month or so later he heard gossip about a Dawson man who cremated his pal in the frozen wilderness. Inspired by the story Robert Service spent the rest of the night walking through the forest going over and over the words of a poem that was to soon become, ‘The Cremation of Sam McGee’. Excuse me saying so but this really is a heart-warming story. 

Service certainly had a way with words: “I have gazed on naked grandeur .. .. ‘ from which was to flow The Call of the Wild. When eventually he had composed sufficient poems for a book the hobo poet sent his work with a cheque attached to a book printer. The poet’s intention was to Christmas gift a copy of the collection to each of his friends. 

The employees at the printer’s workshop were thrilled by the verse they found themselves printing and binding. The firm’s salesman then entertained the printers by reciting the verse. With an eye to the quick buck the printer’s representative sold 1,700 copies of Service’s collection from the printing galley proofs. Robert Service’s cheque was returned to him and with it went an offer of 10 per cent royalties if he were to sign a contract. 

For Robert Service there was no looking back. Copies reached Whitehorse. There, his pastor gave the poet a dressing down for the wickedness of his poetry. Service hung his head in shame but, not far behind came the tourists who arrived in Whitehorse looking for the famous poet. 

Feted throughout the world the English born poet became the richest and most celebrated poet in history. Despite his fame and his riches, Robert Service served with distinction as a volunteer during the Great War. 

A Parisian at the time he was very nearly executed as a spy. He worked as a stretcher bearer and ambulance driver whereupon he penned a book of war-related poetry. This anthology was his most successful and brought him the most riches. 

His wealth never separated him from the ‘luxuries of penury’. It is a quirk of human nature that despite his riches Robert Service spoke eloquently for the down and out, the hobo and the drifter. It is this ~ these poems that convince me that poets, like the great musicians, are indeed the voice of God.

Quote for the Day

“Voyager, in case it's ever encountered by extraterrestrials, is carrying photos of life on earth, greetings in fifty-five languages, and a collection of music from Gregorian chant to Chuck Berry, including "Dark Was the Night, Cold Was the Ground" by 1920s bluesman Blind Willie Johnson, whose stepmother blinded him at seven by throwing lye in his eyes after his father beat her for being with another man. He died penniless of pneumonia after sleeping bundled in wet newspapers in the ruins of his house that burned down, but his music just left the solar system.” 

- Josh, The West Wing 

For you, Noel: 

The only known photograph of Blind Willie Johnson

Blind Willie Johnson (January 25, 1897 – September 18, 1945) was an American gospel blues singer, guitarist and evangelist. His landmark recordings completed between 1927 and 1930—thirty songs in total—display a combination of powerful "chest voice" singing, slide guitar skills, and originality that has influenced later generations of musicians. Even though Johnson's records sold well, as a street performer and preacher he had little wealth in his lifetime. His life was poorly documented, but over time music historians such as Samuel Charters have uncovered more about Johnson and his five recording sessions. 

A revival of interest in Johnson's music began in the 1960s, following his inclusion on Harry Smith's Anthology of American Folk Music, and by the efforts of the blues guitarist Reverend Gary Davis. Johnson's work has become more accessible through compilation albums such as American Epic: The Best of Blind Willie Johnson and the Charters compilations. As a result, Johnson is credited as one of the most influential practitioners of the blues, and his slide guitar playing, particularly on his hymn "Dark Was the Night, Cold Was the Ground", is highly acclaimed. Other recordings by Johnson include "Jesus Make Up My Dying Bed", "It's Nobody's Fault but Mine", and "John the Revelator". 

In 1977, Carl Sagan and a team of researchers were tasked with collecting a representation of Earth and the human experience for sending on the Voyager probe to other life forms in the universe. Among the 27 songs selected for the Voyager Golden Record, "Dark Was the Night, Cold Was the Ground" was chosen by NASA consultant Timothy Ferris because, according to Ferris, "Johnson's song concerns a situation he faced many times: nightfall with no place to sleep. Since humans appeared on Earth, the shroud of night has yet to fall without touching a man or woman in the same plight". 

Click on the following link for Dark Was the Night, Cold was the Ground: 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OjLSf8y94fU

Future Bytes: 

Blind Lemon Jefferson

Blind Willie McTell

Sonny Terry

Blind Boy Fuller

Blind Blake

Reverend Gary Davis.

History Pics

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Continuing: Photos of Historical Events That Will Give you a New Perspective 

Photos and text from: 

https://playjunkie.com/articleid-435345677/4/?dai=5ygvRV023KUkiscU828cK 

Additional comments by moi. 

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Unbreakable Seal 

The discovery of Tutankhamun’s tomb sparked a renewed public interest in ancient Egypt, after every major news outlet in the world covered the event in 1922. British archaeologist Howard Carter spent decades cataloguing all the objects his crew found inside, but eventually came to the conclusion he might be missing a few. 

He realized that ancient seal at the door wasn’t untouched for 3,245 years, as everyone first thought. As a matter of fact, it was robbed at least twice before Carter and his team stumbled upon it. 

Comment: 

How did the rope last 3,200 years without deteriorating? 

Rope is one of the fundamental human technologies. Archaeologists have found two-ply ropes going back 28,000 years. Egypt was the first documented civilization to use specialized tools to make rope. One key to its longevity isn’t the rope itself, but the aridity of the air in the desert. It dries out and preserves things. Another key is oxygen deprivation. Tombs are sealed to the outside. Bacteria can break things down as long as they have oxygen, but then they effectively suffocate. It’s not uncommon to find rope, wooden carvings, cloth, organic dyes, etc. in Egyptian pyramids and tombs that wouldn’t have survived elsewhere in the world. Egypt’s desert conditions made possible the preservation of far more organic material than would have otherwise been the case. This in contrast to, say, Maya sites in Central America which are far younger, but from which almost no organic material has been recovered. The main difference is jungle versus desert conditions. 

https://rarehistoricalphotos.com/unbroken-seal-tutankhamun-tomb-1922/

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Epic Trio 

Joseph Stalin, Franklin D. Roosevelt, and Winston Churchill were three of the biggest political figures of their generation, but getting them in the same room wasn’t an easy task. The meeting captured in the photo took place back in 1943, during the Tehran Conference. 

The leaders of the “big three” allied countries met at the Soviet Union’s embassy in Tehran, where they discussed war strategy and eventually decided to open a second front against Nazi Germany, because they felt it would be impossible to win WWII without it. 

Comment: 

The Tehran Conference (codenamed Eureka) (which is also the name of our Trivia team, after the 1854 Eureka Stockade rebellion in Ballarat, Victoria) was a strategy meeting of Joseph Stalin, Franklin D. Roosevelt, and Winston Churchill from 28 November to 1 December 1943, after the Anglo-Soviet Invasion of Iran. It was held in the Soviet Union's embassy in Tehran, Iran. 

It was the first of the World War II conferences of the "Big Three" Allied leaders (the Soviet Union, the United States, and the United Kingdom). It closely followed the Cairo Conference which had taken place on 22–26 November 1943, and preceded the 1945 Yalta and Potsdam conferences. 

Although the three leaders arrived with differing objectives, the main outcome of the Tehran Conference was the Western Allies' commitment to open a second front against Nazi Germany. The conference also addressed the 'Big Three' Allies' relations with Turkey and Iran, operations in Yugoslavia and against Japan, and the envisaged post-war settlement. A separate protocol signed at the conference pledged the Big Three to recognize Iran's independence. 

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tehran_Conference 

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Pollution Crises 

This photo was taken in 1966. New York City was one of America’s most polluted cities at the time, and after seeing this photo, the public could no longer deny that human activity led to a pollution crisis of epic proportions. 

Rachel Carson’s book Silent Spring, published in 1962, was a tipping point. It informed us of the destructive effects of pesticides on the environment, and led to the establishment of the Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) in 1970. 

Comment: 

“It is not my contention that chemical insecticides must never be used. I do contend that we have put poisonous and biologically potent chemicals indiscriminately into the hands of persons largely or wholly ignorant of their potentials for harm. We have subjected enormous numbers of people to contact with these poisons, without their consent and often without their knowledge.” 

― Rachel Carson, Silent Spring 

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War Animals 

Facing the horrors of war becomes a little bit easier when you have something to remind you of happier times. This Red Army soldier found the encouragement he needed in this tiny kitten that he spotted in the trenches during the Second World War. 

US Forces also employed thousands of animals during this time. Some of the units fighting in World War II even had animal mascots. All the soldiers did their best to take care of them, because they were considered to be bearers of good luck. 

Comment: 

That’s a wire wheel for a field radio on the soldier’s back.. Since there was no wireless communications, guys would crawl dragging a wire behind them. Snipers took out a lot. 

A touching moment on the battlefield. 

Here is a colourised version 

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Quote for the Day

An Abandoned Irish House and Dan O'Hara

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Byter and personal friend Wayne B sent me an email about the post with pics of abandoned Irish, Scottish and English cottages and buildings: “Wonderful images of the past -what stories could each building tell.” 

It reminded that 5 years ago – June 14, 2014 – I had posted about one such Irish cottage resident, Dan O’Hara, the subject of a song by Finbar Furey. I had been privileged to hear him sing it in person when Kate and I attended his performance with Byer Steve M and wife Diane. A wonderful singer and musician and a kind, warm man. 

Here is a reprint of that post. 

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Song Spot: Dan OHara

A couple of years ago I was privileged to see and hear Finbar Furey perform. He is an amazing singer and musician who is now pursuing a solo career after being part of the Irish folk band The Fureys.

One of the songs sung by Finbar was Dan O’Hara, a sad song about the adversities suffered by the farmer Dan O’Hara. Was he a real person? Was he as unfortunate as the lyrics say, being visited by misfortunes that would likely have broken a lesser man?

Performance:

The only internet version by Finbar Furey I have been able to locate is at:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QHIlD24Zc30https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QHIlD24Zc30

Although his is the best imho, here are a couple of performances by alternative performers:

Donie Carroll:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-IWQHcOzkGg

Sean Reilly, unaccompanied

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pitBtAvMtLc

For those who like Finbar Furey as much as I do, here are some other numbers by him:

River of Steel

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=exfvn-SenaI

Colours

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tXcaGVV5K-4&index=14&list=AL94UKMTqg-9CcREremOlRW7xARwaXoQ70

After Sunday Mass

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ToFRdWuep6c&index=15&list=AL94UKMTqg-9CcREremOlRW7xARwaXoQ70

The Old Man

shttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M6SIl-r9crs

When You Were Sweet Sixteen

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ghwql3koHmM

Lyrics:

Dan O’Hara

It's here I am today God gave and took away

And left without a home for Dan O'Hara

With these matches in my hand in the frost and snow I stand

But here I am today your broken hearted 

In the year of sixty four we had acres by the score

The grandest land a man could pull a plough through

But the landlord came you know and he laid our home to low

And here I am today your broken-hearted

Cushla gra mo craoi*

won't you buy a box from me

And have the prayers of Dan from Connemara.

Sure I'll sell them cheap and low

buy a box before you go

from the broken-hearted farmer Dan O'Hara.

*Cushla gra mo craoi: Dear brightness of my heart

And for twenty years or more did misfortune cross our door

My poor old wife and I were sadly parted

We were scattered far and wide and our children starved and died

But here I am today your broken-hearted

Cushla gra mo craoi

won't you buy a box from me

and have the prayers of Dan from Connemara.

Sure I'll sell them cheap and low

buy a box before you go

from the broken-hearted farmer Dan O'Hara.

Tho' in frost and snow I stand beneath the shadow of God's hand

It lies warm from the brow of Dan O'Hara

And so soon with God above I will meet the ones I love

And find the live I lost in Connemara

Cushla gra mo craoi

won't you buy a box from me

and have the prayers of Dan from Connemara.

Sure I'll sell them cheap and low

buy a box before you go

from the broken-hearted farmer Dan O'Hara.

3x

Dan O’Hara History:

The Dan O’Hara of the Irish folk song was indeed a real person and his misfortunes were equally real. His story is not unique, it is illustrative and reflective of the history adversities, sadnesses and injustices of Ireland in the 19th century.

Dan O’Hara had a successful farm, rented in Connemara, where he lived with hsi wife and 8 children. When he increased the size of the windows in the cottage, his landlord increased the rent to a level that he could no longer afford to pay. Evicted from the farm, he emigrated to New York but his wife and three of his children died during the passage. A sad and broken man, he was reduced to selling matches on street corners.

Here is a lengthy, but fascinating, history from a website The Wild Geese:The History of the Irish Worldwide. The post on that website is called Dan O’Hara: The man Behind the Song and it was written by the delightfully named Gearoid O’Domhnaill. It is at: 

http://thenewwildgeese.com/profiles/blogs/dan-o-hara-the-man-behind-the-song

I had occasion to visit Dan O’Hara’s hillside farm in Connemara recently as part of my work as a tour guide, work that takes me all over the country. The owner Martin Walsh, a natural born storyteller captivated the group with the story of how the unfortunate farmer ended up in New York and sang the sad song which told of his misfortune. The name O’Hara itself comes from the Irish Ó hEaghra, Eaghra being a Sligo chieftain who died in 926. By the standards of the area he would have been regarded as something of a prosperous farmer who farmed eight acres around his average sized cottage. The potato was the main source of food and an acre and a half of potatoes would feed five or six people for six months. At the time nobody owned the land on which they farmed and the tenants could be evicted on a whim or if the landlord suddenly decided the land would more profitably be used for grazing. The landlord tenant relationship was very different to that of in England. Firstly the landlord did not usually live in Ireland; indeed many rarely if ever visited their Irish estate and seldom had any idea was what going on there. Secondly the landlords viewed their tenants as a conquered people to be exploited. They preferred to let local land agents, known as ‘land sharks’ take care of their estates and send the rent to England. The tenants lived in fear of these agents. 

Though the cottage is half way up a mountain it was a focal point in the area for several céilis and many men found their future wife at his home. The area is today sparsely populated but in the 1840s it would have considerably more densely populated. Not only would the Famine decimate the population of Connemara but it also affected the Irish speaking culture. His fatal mistake was to improve his cottage by installing larger windows around 1845. Home improvements were frowned upon by landlords and agents. Doors and windows could not exceed a certain height and dimension without the notorious window tax coming into force. It is from this tax that the phrase ‘daylight robbery’, a tax on natural daylight, stems. The already high rent was increased and O’Hara failed to make the payment at ‘gale day’. Tenants would not have had any right of appeal and could expect no mercy. The end came when the landlord’s agent arrived with the bailiffs, a battering ram and the heavily armed RIC. The thatch was set alight, the walls pushed in and the family left without a home. Evicted tenants would then usually set up a make shift shelter in a ditch or a bog hole and live like animals. Very often however they would be expelled from the area and friends and neighbours would be forbidden from taking them in.

America offered the only chance of survival. His friends and neighbours would surely have keened the departure of the O’Hara family with an American Wake, sadly accepting the fact that they would never see Dan O’Hara in Connemara again. It was the fate shared by thousands at the time. It is not known which ship the O’Hara family left on. More than likely he would have left through Clifden or Galway. The ships which sailed the Atlantic became known as ’coffin ships’ and conditions on board were appalling. Passengers were not screened prior to boarding and many came on board with typhus. A typical journey could be anywhere from forty days to three months, depending on the wind and the skill of the captain. It was assumed that the passengers would bring their own food and the ships were only required to provide 7 pounds of food per week per passenger. Many passengers were starving when they started the journey and they depended on this meagre ration which was often poorly cooked presenting further health problems. The sick and dying lay in their own filth with no doctor on board to tend to them or priest to give the last rites. Not only was the food a problem but the water supply often became contaminated which led to dysentery. Some ships even ran out of water which increased the torment of those already suffering. Of the 100,000 Irish that sailed to North America in 1847, one in five died from disease and malnutrition. Only the strongest would survive and Dan O’Hara’s wife and three of his children did not survive the voyage.

Dan O’Hara arrived in New York a sad and broken man. In mid 19th century America no group in America was considered lower than the Irish and many, including Dan O’Hara, would have spoken little or no English which is why even today so much of New York slang has Irish roots. Conditions for the newly arrived emigrants were little better than in famine Ireland. Most of the Irish would have lived in a shanty, from the Irish sean tí, which were a common feature in urban areas. At the time 80% of all infants born to Irish immigrants in New York City died. Dan O’Hara was forced to put his remaining children into an orphanage. As the song proclaims he sold matches though his Irish accent would have been scorned by the Nativists, the white Anglo Saxon Protestants who formed the ruling elite of America. He ended his days in destitution and never got to live the American Dream.

Dan O’Hara would have long faded into obscurity were it not for singers such as Delia Murphy (1902-71) from Clare Morris who wrote the song and set it to music in 1951 at a time when such songs were not popular. She learnt many of her songs from the travellers who camped on her father’s land. Finbar Furey also adopted the song into his repertoire making sure the unfortunate farmer would not be forgotten. 

The cottage where Dan O’Hara once lived was restored in 1992 where it now forms part of the Connemara Heritage Centre at Lettershea on the N59 on the Galway side of Clifden.

Pics:

Dan O'Hara's restopred cottage:

Here is a video with some views of the house, the area and an appearance by the owner of the site who is also the founder of the Connemara Heritage and History Centre.  It's worth a look:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e-4Y9LgiQAg

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