Thursday, September 21, 2023

EXTRACT

From Catch 22
by Joseph Heller (1923-1999)

“'And don't tell me God works in mysterious ways,' Yossarian continued, hurtling on over her objection. 'There is nothing so mysterious about it. He's not working at all. He's playing. Or else He's forgotten all about us. That's the kind of God you people talk about - a country bumpkin, a clumsy, bungling, brainless, conceited, uncouth hayseed. Good God, how much reverence can you have for a Supreme Being who finds it necessary to include such phenomena as phlegm and tooth decay in His divine system of creation? What in the world was running through that warped, evil, scatalogical mind of His when He robbed old people of the power to control their bowel movements? Why in the world did He ever create pain?'

“'You'd better not talk that way about Him, honey,' she warned him reprovingly in a low and hostile voice. 'He might punish you.'

'Isn't He punishing me enough?' Yossarian snorted resentfully. 'You know, we mustn't let him get away with it. Oh no, we certainly mustn't let Him get away scot-free for all the sorrow He's caused us. Someday I'm going to make Him pay. I know when. On the Judgment Day. Yes, that's the day I'll be close enough to reach out and grab that little yokel by His neck and -'

'Stop it! Stop it!'

'What the hell are you getting so upset about?' he asked her bewilderedly in a tone of contrite amusement. 'I thought you didn't believe in God.'

'I don't,' she sobbed, bursting violently into tears. 'But the God I don't believe in is a good God, a just God, a merciful God. He's not the mean and stupid God you make him out to be.'

Yossarian laughed and turned her arms loose. 'Let's have a little more religious freedom between us,' he proposed obligingly. 'You don't believe in a God you want to, and I won't believe in a God I want to. Is that a deal?'”




Wednesday, September 20, 2023

QUOTE FOR THE DAY

 ---------oOo---------




OLD TIME COUNTRY HALLS

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I have a tremendous respect for the late Slim Dusty, who made a point of bringing music to the folk of the outback, even if it meant singing in tents and from the backs of trucks.

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From Wikipedia:

Slim (1927 – 2003) was an Australian country music singer-songwriter, guitarist and producer. He was an Australian cultural icon, referred to universally as Australia's King of Country Music and one of the country's most awarded stars, with a career spanning nearly seven decades and producing numerous recordings. He was known to record songs in the legacy of Australia, particularly of bush life and renowned Australian bush poets Henry Lawson and Banjo Paterson that represented the lifestyle. The music genre was coined the "bush ballad", a style first made popular by Buddy Williams, the first artist to perform the genre in Australia, and also for his many trucking songs.

Slim Dusty:

- released more than a hundred albums, selling more than seven million records and earning over 70 gold and platinum album certifications

- was the first Australian to have a No. 1 international hit song, with a version of Gordon Parsons' "A Pub with No Beer"

- received 38 Golden Guitar and an Australian Recording Industry Association (ARIA) award

- was inducted into the ARIA Hall of Fame and Australian Roll of Renown

- at the time of his death, at the age of 76, had been working on his 106th album for EMI Records

- during his lifetime, was considered an Australian National Treasure

- performed "Waltzing Matilda" at the closing ceremony of the Sydney 2000 Olympic Games.

---------oOo---------

The following link is to a clip of Slim Dusty singing about the disappearing old time country halls, - take the time to have a look and listen, the images are poignant:


---------oOo---------

Lyrics:

As I pick up my guitar to sing another song
I hear the walls of this old hall - you've done this thing too long
You know you've been around for years, I guess you've shown us all
I talk like this when I reminisce with an old time country hall
I joined a tent show as a kid with a dream and an old guitar
The Silvers All-Star Cavalcade and Dandy was the star
He taught me lots about the game, today I understand
He was a great magician, Dandy was a fine old man
I'm a howlin' cattle-hand crooner
I'm an old time dinosaur
Hey, let me sing where the rafters ring
In an old time country hall, that's right
I've been on the road for thirty years but Dandy could double that
And you'll find his faded poster still in some hall way out back
I like to go back stage and dream sometimes and just recall
The shows I've had, the good and bad, shared with these country halls
Take the old Town Hall Kalgoorlie with it's old time charm and grace
And your mounting million complexes never will replace
All glass and steal and concrete, some large and some too small
So let me sing where the rafters ring in an old time country hall, hey
We showed last night in the school of arts and the town was real run-down
You'll find so many towns like that today as you move around
Yeah, the wind of change is blowin' up such an economic low
The old time shows we used to know will soon be off the road
I'm a howlin' cattle-hand crooner
I'm an old time dinosaur
Hey, let me sing where the rafters ring
In an old time country hall
In an old time country hall
In an old time country hall

---------oOo---------

Some YouTube reader comments at the above video:

This song could never get old

I'm glad I grew up listening to slim dusty thank you Dad for making me listening this legend

Legend! Respect for this music art of yours! RIP mate.

God bless you slim, soundtrack of my childhood and every road trip of my life. Hope your resting in peace old timer

Another era? Some songs never age. Dinosaur

What a song



Tuesday, September 19, 2023

QUOTE FOR THE DAY

 


FROM THE VAULT


---------oOo---------

I am reposting the below item from a past Bytes for a number of reasons:
  • I am short on time because of commitments tomorrow.
  • The item came to mind today.
  • It is interesting, at least to me.
  • It was posted in Bytes on November 20, 2010, so most readers will either not have seen it likely may not recall it.
Drop me a note by email to let me know what you think.

---------oOo---------

Sator Square


Marie Antoinette once said that she did not believe in ghosts but she was afraid of them. So it is with mysteries, puzzles and phenomenon. I remain a sceptic but, at the same time, I admit that there are more things in Heaven and Earth than are dreamt of in our philosophy.

Lyall Watson wrote a book called Supernature. His hypothesis was that between the realms of the natural and the supernatural was an area he called Supernature (sounds like yesterday's quote of the introduction to the Twilight Zone), that area in which science has simply not yet advanced far enough to understand and explain things that we currently regard as supernatural.

Take Penn and Teller, for instance. We all watch magic and wonder how the tricks are achieved. We know that what we see are tricks, that the woman in the box is not really cut in half and rejoined but we marvel because we don’t know how it’s done. It’s magic. Until Penn and Teller show us and then all the magic is gone. We see how easy it was to fool us and what had been amazing is now simply sleight of hand, distraction and trickery.

See, for instance:

Which brings me to a mystery which has not yet been explained, the Sator Squre:



Following are comments about the puzzle:

- The Sator Square is a word square containing a Latin palindrome featuring the words SATOR AREPO TENET OPERA ROTA. The words are written in a way that they may be read top-to-bottom, bottom-to-top, left-to-right, and right-to-left. The words may also be read boustrophedon (”ox-turning”), that is, bi-directional like oxen in ploughing.

- The earliest known appearance of the square was found in the ruins of Pompeii, which was buried in the ash of Mt. Vesuvius in 79 AD.

- Apart from numerous examples throughout Rome, it has been found on walls in England, Syria, France, Malta and Portugal. It has been found on drinking vessels and artefacts, with examples also being found in Africa and the Americas.

- One example found in Manchester and dating from the 2nd century AD is believed to be evidence of the earliest Christianity in Britain. The examples found in England, at Manchester and at Cirencester (below), are more correctly Rotas Squares in that the first word is Rotas rather than the more traditional Sator:


- The translation of the words is still open to debate, the words having defied translation into a meaningful sentence.

- Some translations that have been put forward are:

'The sower Arepo holds the wheels with effort'

"The farmer Arepo uses his plough as his form of work."

'The sower Arepo leads with his hand (work) the plough (wheels)."

Why would such an ordinary phrase of no consequence spread world wide from Rome?

One commentator believes that the correct translation, in terms of meaning as well as literal wording, is:

"God holds the plough, but you turn the furrows."

Another highly regarded workable translation is

"The Great Sower holds in his hand all works; all works the Great Sower holds in his hand."

- One author has argued that the Sator Square is actually a dedication to Mithras, a deity worshipped by the Romans (the subject of a previous Bytes post) and that there are further anagrams and palindromes within the Square, see:


- Other writers have noted that using the letters in the Square, it is possible to form a vertical and horizontal Pater Noster (“Our Father”), with two A’s and two O’s left over. These letters are argued to represent Alpha (beginning) and Omega (end), with the Pater Noster cross alleged to have been a Christian symbol to alert Christians of the presence of other Christians.


Whatever the answer, it is interesting.




Monday, September 18, 2023

QUOTE FOR THE DAY

 







ORIGINS OF SUPERSTITIONS


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"It's bad luck to open an umbrella indoors."


Though some historians tentatively trace this belief back to ancient Egyptian times, the superstitions that surrounded pharaohs' sunshades were actually quite different and probably unrelated to the modern-day one about raingear. Most historians think the warning against unfurling umbrellas inside originated much more recently, in Victorian England.

In "Extraordinary Origins of Everyday Things" (Harper, 1989), the scientist and author Charles Panati wrote:
"In eighteenth-century London, when metal-spoked waterproof umbrellas began to become a common rainy-day sight, their stiff, clumsy spring mechanism made them veritable hazards to open indoors. A rigidly spoked umbrella, opening suddenly in a small room, could seriously injure an adult or a child, or shatter a frangible object. Even a minor accident could provoke unpleasant words or a minor quarrel, themselves strokes of bad luck in a family or among friends. Thus, the superstition arose as a deterrent to opening an umbrella indoors."
---------oOo---------

"It's bad luck to walk under a leaning ladder."


This superstition does originate 5,000 years ago in ancient Egypt. A ladder leaning against a wall forms a triangle, and Egyptians regarded this shape as sacred (as exhibited, for example, by their pyramids). To them, triangles represented the trinity of the gods, and to pass through a triangle was to desecrate them.

This belief wended its way up through the ages. "Centuries later, followers of Jesus Christ usurped the superstition, interpreting it in light of Christ's death," Panati explained. "Because a ladder had rested against the crucifix, it became a symbol of wickedness, betrayal, and death. Walking under a ladder courted misfortune."

In England in the 1600s, criminals were forced to walk under a ladder on their way to the gallows.

---------oOo---------

"A broken mirror gives you seven years of bad luck."


In ancient Greece, it was common for people to consult "mirror seers," who told their fortunes by analysing their reflections. As the historian Milton Goldsmith explained in his book "Signs, Omens and Superstitions" (1918), "divination was performed by means of water and a looking glass. This was called catoptromancy. The mirror was dipped into the water and a sick person was asked to look into the glass. If his image appeared distorted, he was likely to die; if clear, he would live."

In the first century A.D., the Romans added a caveat to the superstition. At that time, it was believed that peoples' health changed in seven year cycles . A distorted image resulting from a broken mirror therefore meant seven years of ill-health and misfortune, rather than outright death.

---------oOo---------

"When you spill salt, toss some over your left shoulder to avoid bad luck."


Spilling salt has been considered unlucky for thousands of years. Around 3,500 B.C., the ancient Sumerians first took to nullifying the bad luck of spilled salt by throwing a pinch of it over their left shoulders. This ritual spread to the Egyptians, the Assyrians and later, the Greeks.

The superstition ultimately reflects how much people prized (and still prize) salt as a seasoning for food. The etymology of the word "salary" shows how highly we value it. According to Panati: "The Roman writer Petronius, in the Satyricon, originated 'not worth his salt' as opprobrium for Roman soldiers, who were given special allowances for salt rations, called salarium 'salt money' the origin of our word 'salary.'"

---------oOo---------

More to come.

Sunday, September 17, 2023

QUOTE FOR THE DAY

 



FACTS



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Peacocks aren't actually called peacocks!

The colourful birds are actually the male of the species and therefore known as peacocks. The species as a whole is called peafowl, and lady peafowl are called peahens. A baby peafowl is a chick or a peachick. A group of peacocks is called an "ostentation" or a "muster".

The two Asiatic species of peafowl are the blue or Indian peafowl originally from the Indian subcontinent, and the green peafowl from Southeast Asia. The colourful plumage of the peacock is especially prominent in the Asiatic species, which have an eye-spotted "tail" or "train" of covert feathers, which they display as part of a courtship ritual.

The functions of the elaborate iridescent colouration and large "train" of peacocks have been the subject of extensive scientific debate. Charles Darwin suggested that they served to attract females, and the showy features of the males had evolved by sexual selection. More recently, Amotz Zahavi proposed in his handicap principle that these features acted as honest signals of the males' fitness, since less-fit males would be disadvantaged by the difficulty of surviving with such large and conspicuous structures.


A peachick


---------oOo---------

McDonald's invented a sweet-tasting type of broccoli

It sounds like one of Willy Wonka's rejected ideas: Bubble gum-flavored broccoli. But the creation was far from fictional: It was a concoction whipped up by the fast-food giant McDonald's in 2014, the motivation being to create a way to get kids to eat healthier.

However, apparently adding a sweet flavor to broccoli doesn't make it any more appetizing to kids, who were confused by the taste.

The fast-food chain is under pressure to create healthier options. Instead of introducing candy-flavored veggies, it's now focusing on tactics such as reducing the size of its fry servings and adding low-fat yogurt to its Happy Meals.


---------oOo---------

Apple pie isn't American

Apple trees are not native to America. They originated in Central Asia and were grown in Asia and Europe long before European colonists brought them to North America.

However American-grown apples and American-style apple pies eventually became renowned for having a special sweetness and flavor. That led to the term “American apple pie,” which was used to distinguish American-style apple pies from pies made in other countries.

By the 1920s, the phrase “as American as apple pie” was floating around. By the 1940s it had become a common idiomatic expression.

There is a 1967 notorious variation from black activist H. Rap Brown, who gave a speech at a press conference in Washington, D.C. that is widely cited as the origin of his well-known quote “Violence is as American as cherry pie.”

What Brown said:
“I say violence is necessary. Violence is a part of America’s culture. It is as American as cherry pie. Americans taught the black people to be violent. We will use that violence to rid ourselves of oppression if necessary. We will be free, by any means necessary.”
What it became shortened to and quoted:


Ironically, at the time, Brown was Director of the Student Nonviolent Coordinating Committee (SNCC).

At his speech, Brown also added “If you give me a gun and tell me to shoot my enemy, I might just shoot Lady Bird.” (Referring to President Johnson’s wife, Claudia, whose popular nickname was “Lady Bird.”) Brown went on to call President Johnson a “white honky cracker” and “a mad wild dog” and said that if America’s cities didn’t “come around” they “should be burned down.”

None of his comments that day gained the lasting notoriety of his cherry pie aphorism.

He is currently serving a life sentence for murder following the shooting of two Fulton County, Georgia, sheriff's deputies in 2000,

---------oOo---------

The first speeding fine took place in 1896


On 28 January 1896, Walter Arnold (UK), drove his "horse-less carriage" through the village of Paddock Wood, Kent, at more than four times the speed limit – a reckless 8 mph (13 km/h)! He was chased down by a police officer on a bicycle who charged him with breaking the law on four counts:
- using a locomotive without a horse on a public road;
- allowing said locomotive to be operated by fewer than three persons;
- travelling at a greater rate than two miles per hour; and
- failing to clearly display his name and address on the locomotive.

He was brought before a local magistrate on 30 January and found guilty on all four counts. He was fined £4 7s in total of which 10 shillings was for the speeding charge.

In the late 19th century, motor vehicles — which had not yet reached widespread use — were regulated in the U.K. by a series of laws called the Locomotives Acts. The 1865 Locomotives Act, in particular, contained a section that effectively imposed a two-part speed limit: 4 mph in the countryside; and 2 mph in cities and towns.

The 1865 act was sometimes colloquially known as the "Red Flag Act" due to its third section, which required no fewer than three individuals to operate any non-animal-powered locomotive, one of whom had to walk "not less than 60 yards" ahead of the vehicle, waving a red flag and "[warning] the riders and drivers of horses of the approach of such locomotives."

Later in 1896, the U.K. parliament duly increased the speed limit to 14 mph.

During the Commons debate over the liberalization of the speed limit, some members warned of an inexorable upwards rise in the speeds of horseless carriages. One member reportedly "asked the House to fancy these things going along at 18 miles an hour," while another member provoked laughter when he "inquired whether they could not look forward to going 20 or 25 miles an hour some day."

---------oOo---------

A dog was once voted as a mayor four times!


Duke, a Great Pyrenees dog, held office in the village of Cormorant, Minnesota. He served four one-year terms – that's 28 years for a dog – after a fun community vote took a serious turn when the pooch became a viral sensation.

---------oOo---------

The abbreviation OMG was used over 100 years ago

It was first used during the First World War by an admiral named John Arbuthnot Fisher. In a letter to Winston Churchill dated 9/9/17, he wrote "I hear that a new order of Knighthood is on the tapis – O.M.G. (Oh! My God!) – Shower it on the Admiralty!"



Saturday, September 16, 2023

QUOTE FOR THE DAY

 


READERS WRITE

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From Philippa W in response to the Funny Friday post about cats . . .
Haha Otto,

Thanks for Funny Friday.

I love the limerick, and the cat-who-chewed-your-new-shoes. 🎶

However, even with the clever cartoons I cannot endorse those uses for a deceased cat. 🙄

Hope your day is going well.

Love, Pip
Thanks Pip.

Here are some pics to make up for that . . .



__________

The article about customer service, or rather lack of customer service, resulted in some feedback . . .
__________

From Phillip C:
Hi Otto,

Several years ago, I went to get my haircut at the usual place which was under new management.

When I walked in the young man behind the desk pointed to the chair which I dutifully sat in. He then continued his private phone conversation. After several minutes I got up and walked out and I am pretty sure he did not even notice me leave.

Fortunately, I am follicly challenged and could buy an electric hair trimmer to “cut” my own hair. So, my dollars were lost to the industry not just a local retailer.

PS About 12 months after my experience I notice the offending barber shop was no longer trading.

Regards

Philip
Thanks Phil.
__________

From Ron T in the US:
Beautiful, brilliant, perfectly on point ! ! Your Bytes are always great. This one, however, will likely compete for the greatest.

I recently waited for counter service at my [now former] bank while the teller was finishing her lengthy chitchat with a friend of hers who concluded her banking business, but not their conversation.

PISSED - but Midwestern courtesies prevailed. Not that my account will put the bank into default, but I'm done, over, finished, and still pissed.

What tipped the scale was the teller, who saw me waiting, acted surprised to notice me there waiting.

Still pissed.
Thanks Ron
__________

By the way, some favourite customer service anecdotes about Kerry Packer, Australia's richest man when he was alive . . .                                    ;

Around the mid-90s, late one night in some English village, Kerry Packer was riding the high of his polo team’s victory. With every intention of treating the fellas to a coupla schoobangers and a hearty feed, they rocked up at a pub. Given the hour, the kitchen was closed and they were turned away in less-than-polite fashion. 

At the next hotel over, Packer & Co. received the exact same news. Only this time, the owner was a touch more accommodating. 

“There’s some ham out the back and I can make you up some sandwiches,” he said. 

Naturally, after a spirited match and the nocturnal trek in search of some grub, Packer and his mates dug in with plenty of enthusiasm. The publican later returned with a bill for £128. Thankful an effort was made, Packer wrote him a cheque for their meals and drinks – with an additional £100,000 as a tip and a hilarious condition. 

“Before you bank it, take it to the other pub at the end of the village, and show it to the bloke who wouldn’t give us any grub.”

https://www.bosshunting.com.au/hustle/billionaire-antics-kerry-packer-stories/  

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He pushed $80,000 worth of chips towards a “deserving croupier.” She apparently blushed and explained it couldn’t be pocketed as tips were pooled amongst staff. So Packer called the manager, requested her firing on the threat of frequenting competing establishments, before handing her the chips.  “Now rehire this woman immediately.”

---------------- 

From Rob W in respect of the quote by Russell Crowe praising Australia, and the list of Oz facts . . .
Great promo. And I agree with Rusty - Sydney is one of the best cities in the world!

Can't understand, however, that the writer didn't give Canberra and surrounding regions a plug. "Great restaurants, roundabouts, and plenty of roadkill/road rage. Visit the quaint township of Queanbeyan, particularly if you enjoy being tailgated in 50 km zones. Stop in at the Hotel Queanbeyan for an awesome pub lunch. Don't believe what you hear about the Queanbeyan coppers. They're pussycats compared with that mob in Goulborn ". Hahaha
Thanks, Rob
__________

From Vince C in response to the post about The Concert for George and While My Guitar Gently Weeps . . .

Thanks for this post, Otto. Loved every word. I read that the words "gently weeps" in the song came from George's habit of randomly opening a pages of a book, going to, say, the 10th line on that page and using the first two words of that line. I wonder if true. Vince
Thanks Vince.

From the Bytes post:
Inspiration for the song came to him when he was visiting his parents in Warrington, Cheshire, and he began reading the I Ching, or "The Book of Changes". As Harrison put it, "[the book] seemed to me to be based on the Eastern concept that everything is relative to everything else, as opposed to the Western view that things are merely coincidental." Embracing this idea of relativism, he committed to writing a song based on the first words he saw upon opening a book, which happened to be "gently weeps". Harrison continued to work on the lyrics after this initial writing session.

 


Friday, September 15, 2023

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

 



FUNNY FRIDAY

 😀😁😂😃😊😀😁😂😃😊


Some more personal favourites this week, readers, this time from 2013 and all about cats.

Sorry, Rob, you know I am not a cat lover.

Enjoy, readers.

😀😁😂😃😊😀😁😂😃😊


At trivia on Wednesday night one of our team members, Jess, was unhappy that her cat was not well.

Now some years ago my daughter and I lived in a flat with a cat that was, funnily enough, called Jessie. Now this cat, a tortoiseshell, began peeing and spraying everywhere – on the carpets, on the clean washing (I did the washing, I might add, not my daughter), on the beds, inside my camera bag . . . This was in the height of summer and it stank. Someone said have it desexed, that that would solve the problem, so I did but it didn't. Eventually we had to find it another home but to this day I can detect cat urine at 100 paces. It has also left me wondering why the Almighty saw fit to breathe life into such a cold, unfeeling, aloof, pissing, spraying, useless occupier of space.

Nonetheless, in an attempt to cheer up Catwoman Jess, today’s Funny Friday is dedicated to feline furballs.

* * * * *

Some items from the book “101 Uses for a Dead Cat” by Simon Bond:






* * * * *

Pet Diaries:

Excerpts from a Dog's Diary:
* 8:00 am - Dog food! My favourite thing!
* 9:30 am - A car ride! My favourite thing!
* 9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favourite thing!
* 10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favourite thing!
* 12:00 pm - Lunch! My favourite thing!
* 1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favourite thing!
* 3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favourite thing!
* 5:00 pm - Milk bones! My favourite thing!
* 7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favourite thing!
* 8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favourite thing!
* 11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favourite thing!

Excerpts from a Cat's Diary:

Day 983 of my captivity.

My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength. The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.

Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a "good little hunter" I am.

Bastards!

There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of "allergies." I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage.

Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow - but at the top of the stairs.

I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded. The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicate with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe. For now...

* * * * *


* * * * *

I knocked on a bloke's door earlier and said, "Have you lost a cat?"
He said, "Yes."
I said, "Black & White?"
He said, "Yes."
I said, "I've just seen it."
He said, "Whereabouts?"
I said, "Follow me."
I walked up the road, pointed to a tree and said, "There, on that poster."

* * * * *


* * * * *

Roy Rogers buys himself a pair of specially made, hand tooled leather boots. That night, as he is asleep in his bunk with his boots on the floor next to him, a tom cat starts making a racket on the fence outside the window. Roy puts up with the noise as long as he is able until finally, in exasperation, he throws his new boots at it to drive it away. The next morning he goes outside to retrieve the boots, only to find that they have been chewed up by the cat. Angry and annoyed, he places an ad in Variety offering a reward for the cat.

The next morning the doorbell rings. When Roy opens the door, he finds Bing Crosby standing on the doorstep holding a cat by the scruff of the neck. Bing sings “Pardon me Roy, is that the cat that chewed your new shoes?”

* * * * *


LIMERICK OF THE WEEK:

'Near my girl' said a lecher named Cecil,
'Is the place where I usually nestle,
Nothing else is a patch
On the way that we match:
She's the mortar and I am the pestle.'


😀😁😂😃😊😀😁😂😃😊

Thursday, September 14, 2023

QUOTE FOR THE DAY

 


REMEMBER ME?

---------oOo---------

I had occasion to go into a building café today where I bought 2 juices (I was going to be at this venue most of the day) and a yoghurt. After paying at the register and not being offered a bag, I put the juices in my pockets and asked for a spoon. The young lady who I had paid left the register and came back with a fork. I thanked her and said that I preferred to eat my yoghurt with a knife, whereupon she pointed to a table some distance away and said “Over there.”

This was the same café where Kate had previously bought a Reuben sandwich and waited while they toasted it, only to give it to someone who had come after Kate. It was the last Reuben and they refused to provide it to Kate, even though she had bought and paid for it before the other person had come into the café.

It left a sour taste in Kate’s mouth and not from the Reuben, because she never got to eat that.

---------oOo---------

By the way:

  • The Reuben sandwich is a North American grilled sandwich composed of corned beef, Swiss cheese, sauerkraut, and Thousand Island dressing or Russian dressing, grilled between slices of rye bread.
  • One version of the name origin holds that Reuben Kulakofsky, a Lithuanian-born Jewish grocer residing in Omaha, Nebraska, asked for a sandwich made of corned beef and sauerkraut at his weekly poker game held in the Blackstone Hotel from around 1920 through 1935. The participants included the hotel's owner, Charles Schimmel. Schimmel's son, who worked in the kitchen, made the first Reuben for him, adding Swiss cheese and thousand island dressing to his order, putting the whole thing on rye bread. The sandwich first gained local fame when Schimmel put it on the Blackstone's lunch menu, and its fame spread when a former employee of the hotel won the national sandwich idea contest with the recipe. In Omaha, Nebraska, March 14 was proclaimed Reuben Sandwich Day.
  • Another account holds that the Reuben's creator was Arnold Reuben, the German-Jewish owner of Reuben's Delicatessen (1908–2001) in New York City. According to an interview with Craig Claiborne, Arnold Reuben created the "Reuben Special" around 1914. Bernard Sobel in his 1953 book, Broadway Heartbeat: Memoirs of a Press Agent states that the sandwich was an extemporaneous creation for Marjorie Rambeau, inaugurated when the Broadway actress visited the Reuben's Delicatessen one night when the cupboards were particularly bare.
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Which is all getting away from the issue: customer service.

The Great Yoghurt and Fork Incident reminded me of a homily I had posted in Bytes some years earlier – ‘Remember Me? - on April 7, 2011, in fact, when I looked it up, and it is worth a re-post – in this age of online ordering, voice mail orders (I hate that: If your call relates to ##, press ## etc), reducing face to face contact and the disappearance of common courtesy and smiles, it is even more apt than in 2011.

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Remember me?

I'm the person who goes into a restaurant, sits down patiently and waits while the waitresses do everything but take my order.

I'm the person who goes into a department store and stands quietly while the sales clerks finish their little chit-chat.

I'm the person who drives into a petrol station and never blows the horn, but waits patiently while the attendant finishes reading a comic book.

Yes, you might say I'm a good guy, but do you know who else I am?

I'm the person who never comes back, and it amuses me to see you spending thousands of dollars every year to get me back when I was there in the first place … and all you had to do was to show me a little courtesy.