Saturday, January 4, 2020

Curious Items, Part 1



A contribution from Graham E, some interesting items from the past. 

Thanks, Graham. 

Additional comments by moi. 


From Graham:

Hi Mr O, 

A few objects that are `Curiouser and curiouser!' as Alice cried in Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland, chapter II, The Pool of Tears. 


Shoe Fitting Fluoroscopes: 


The shoe-fitting fluoroscope was an upward-facing x-ray tube mounted inside a metal box allowed a customer to place their foot between the tube and the fluoroscopic screen. The x-rays penetrated the shoe and foot and then struck the fluorescent screen, lighting it up with the image of the customer’s foot. A substantial amount of radiation was thus scattered in all directions bathing the entire bodies of the customer as well as the salesman in radiation. 

Additional comments:

Shoe-fitting fluoroscopes, also sold under the names X-ray Shoe Fitter, Pedoscope and Foot-o-scope, were X-ray fluoroscope machines installed in shoe stores from the 1920s until about the 1970s in the United States, Canada, United Kingdom, South Africa, Germany and Switzerland.

In the UK, they were known as Pedoscopes, after the company based in St. Albans that manufactured them. 

In the second half of the 20th century, growing awareness of radiation hazards and increasingly stringent regulations forced their gradual phasing out. 

The child (or the adult customer) would place his or her feet in the opening provided and while remaining in a standing position, look through a viewing porthole at the top of the fluoroscope down at the x-ray view of the feet and shoes. Two other viewing portholes on either side enabled the parent and a sales assistant to observe the child's toes being wiggled to show how much room for the toes there was inside the shoe. The bones of the feet were clearly visible, as was the outline of the shoe, including the stitching around the edges. 

Large variations in dose were possible depending on the machine design, displacement of the shielding materials, and the time and frequency of use. Radiation surveys showed that American machines were ten times more powerful than the British Pedoscopes. 

Exposure was not limited to the feet and damaging effects were cumulative. 

Those most at risk were children, who are about twice as radiosensitive as adults, and salespersons who were exposed on a continual basis. 



Accoustic Locators and Sound Mirrors: 


Before the advent of radar, a lot of countries had developed these types of essentially sonar systems to serve as early warning for air raids. The acoustic locators are used to listen the plane before they attack. The picture shows three Japanese acoustic locators, colloquially known as "war tubas," mounted on four-wheel carriages, being inspected by Japanese Emperor Shōwa. 

Additional comments: 

Also known as “sound trumpets”, they were first used during World War I by France and Britain to spot German Zeppelin airships. 

The devices were essentially large horns connected to a stethoscope. 

A common configuration of the device had three horns arranged vertically plus an extra one to the side. The central one in the set of three and the lateral one were used to get the aircraft's bearing, while the remaining two were used to estimate its height. The operators would listen in through the stethoscope and tilt the horns until they got the loudest sound. 

A two-horn system at Bolling Field, USA, 1921. 

Military men operating aircraft detectors at Kinmel Park military camp, North Wales. 

Sound locators were used near the frontline in conjunction with anti-aircraft guns, but their range was limited to just a few miles. 

To get better range, the British also experimented with a static type of sound locator, made of concrete and shaped like a dish or a curved wall, known as an "acoustic mirror." These were first trialled in the southern and eastern coast of England during World War I and then built in about a dozen locations throughout the 1920s and 1930s. They were up to 30 feet (9 meters) in diameter, but a wall-shaped one in Kent, 60 miles south-east of London, spanned 200 feet (61 meters) in length. Many other countries including Germany, Japan and the United States were also developing sound locators at this time. 

Sound mirrors in Dungeness, Kent. 

The large concrete sound locators were immovable but had better range, about 10 to 15 miles (16-25 kilometres), which would give one in Yorkshire listening to a Zeppelin approaching at a speed of 60 miles an hour (96 km per hour) a 15-minute warning of its arrival. 

After 1930, microphones were used to pick up and amplify the noise, and later still, in 1939, the most advanced systems did away with sound completely and transformed the noise into a visual symbol on a cathode ray tube screen -- an innovation that came from the inventor of stereophonic sound, Alan Blumlein. 

They eventually achieved ranges of up to about 20 miles (32km) in good conditions. What overtook them was the increasing speed of aircraft, which in the late 1930s were traveling at between 190 to 240 miles an hour (300-385km per hour). 

Planes were becoming too fast for sound locators, but in any event by the outbreak of World War II, in 1939, the introduction of radar started making them obsolete, although some sound locators were occasionally used until the end of the war. Radar had a range of 80 miles (130km) and played a crucial role in the Allied victory. 

Several of the sound mirrors built in England (and one built overseas in Malta) survive to this day, and some have received restoration work. 

A woman stands by one of the First World War "Sound Mirror" listening devices at the Fan Bay Deep Shelter within the cliffs overlooking Dover, England. 

Another view of the sound mirrors in Dungeness, Kent. The British experimented with different shaped acoustic mirrors. 

German sound location, 1917. The photograph shows a junior officer and a soldier from an unidentified Feldartillerie regiment wearing combined acoustic/optical locating apparatus. The small-aperture goggles were apparently set so that when the sound was located by turning the head, the aircraft would be visible. 

The Dutch personal parabola, 1930s. This personal sound locator consists of two parabolic sections, presumably made from aluminium for lightness. They are mounted a fixed distance apart, but the size of the human head varies somewhat. To accommodate this, it appears that the instrument is fitted with inflatable ear-pads. According to a report dated 1935, this device was put into at least limited production. 

Dutch personal horns: 1930s. This design no doubt had more gain, thanks to its greater area. It swivelled on the post behind the operator. On the right, a later version of the design on the left. Note the extra cross-bracing added at the top of the horns. There are two counter-weights sticking out towards the rear. Rubber rings cushioned the operator’s ears. 

A Czech locator, 1920s. Scoop-shaped reflectors direct the sound into large-diameter tubes. Manufactured by Goerz. When tested at the Dutch military research station at Waalsdorp it was found it “contained fundamental deficiencies”. 

Perrin acoustic locator on trial in France. 1930s. This machine was designed by French Nobel prizewinner Jean-Baptiste Perrin. Each of the four assemblies carries 36 small hexagonal horns, arranged in six groups of six. Presumably this arrangement was intended to increase the gain or directionality of the instrument.9 

German acoustic locator in use. This device was based on the researches of Erich von Hornbostel. With Max Wertheimer, he developed in 1915 a directional listening device that they referred to as the Wertbostel. This device seems to have had some success as they were still discussing licence fees with manufacturers as late as 1934. 

Japanese soldiers demonstrate the use of a “war tuba”. 1932. 

An early radar system in operation at an aerodrome in the south of England. 1930s. 

A four-horn acoustic locator again, in England, 1930s. There are three operators, two with stethoscopes linked to pairs of horns for stereo listening. 

Sound location equipment in Germany, 1939. It consists of four acoustic horns, a horizontal pair and a vertical pair, connected by rubber tubes to stethoscope type earphones worn by the two technicians left and right. The stereo earphones enabled one technician to determine the direction and the other the elevation of the aircraft. 

The acoustic locator could detect targets at distances from 5 to 12 km, depending on weather conditions, operator skill, and the size of the target formation. It gave a directional accuracy of about 2 degrees. 

Swedish soldiers operating an acoustic locator in 1940.


Friday, January 3, 2020

Thought for the Day



Funny Friday

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I was in two minds about posting a Funny Friday, given that the east coast of Australia is experiencing unprecedented fires that have so far taken 17 lives and thousands of homes.  Entire towns have been waiting on beaches for evacuation, reminiscent of Dunkirk; communities are trapped; businesses have been destroyed at a time when they would usually have their greatest trade; half a billion wildlife animals have been killed, as has farm livestock, farmers having to shoot remaining livestock in many cases.

In such circumstances, telling jokes feels a bit like dancing on someone’s grave, especially in that my locality is removed from the fires and the drought which is also devastating the country.

Ultimately I made the decision that in times of crisis, people should persevere and carry on, even with daily routines and activities. I am therefore still posting a Funny Friday whilst respecting and thinking of those less fortunate. 

If anyone wishes to make a donation or otherwise to assist, here are some links for support:

NSW Rural Fire Service
The NSW RFS is composed of volunteers and is the largest volunteer fire service in the world. Rural Fire Brigades are more than just an emergency service, they are also a vital community service, providing a community meeting point and offering assistance with non-emergency roles.

NSW Rural Fire Service
Donations to the families of the two volunteer firefighters who were killed during the Green Wattle Creek fire. Geoffrey Keaton (32 years old) and Andrew O'Dwyer (36) who both leave behind young children.

Salvation Army
The Salvos have launched a Disaster Appeal to support communities affected by the bushfires.

Port Macquarie Koala Hospital
The Port Macquarie Koala Hospital is accepting donations to develop and build watering stations for thirsty koalas on their GoFundMe page.

GIVIT
If you don't have much spare cash but do have useful household items to donate to those affected by the fires, GIVIT might be the place to go. Money can also be donated.
Re NSW:
Re Qld:

Red Cross
Donate to the Red Cross disaster relief and recovery appeal. The Australian Red Cross is supporting communities affected by fires.


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SOME HUMOUR . . .

Husband: My wife is missing. She went shopping yesterday and has not come home.

Sheriff: What is her height?

Husband: Gee, I'm not sure. A little over five-feet tall.

Sheriff: Weight?

Husband: Don't know. Not slim, not really fat.

Sheriff: Colour of eyes?

Husband: Sort of brown I think. Never really noticed.

Sheriff: Colour of hair?

Husband: Changes a couple times a year. Maybe dark brown now. I can't remember.

Sheriff: What was she wearing?

Husband: Could have been pants, or maybe a skirt or shorts. I don't know exactly.

Sheriff: What kind of car did she go in?

Husband: She went in my truck.

Sheriff: What kind of truck was it?

Husband: A 2015 Ford F150 King Ranch 4X4 with Eco-boost 5.0L V8 engine special ordered with manual transmission and climate controlled air conditioning. It has a custom matching white cover for the bed, which has a matching aftermarket bed liner. Custom leather 6-way seats and !!Bubba‽ floor mats. Trailering package with gold hitch and special wiring hook-ups. DVD with full GPS navigation, satellite radio receiver, 23-channel CB radio, six cup holders, a USB port, and four power outlets. I added special alloy wheels and off-road Michelins. It has custom running boards and indirect wheel well lighting. At this point the husband started choking up.

Sheriff: Take it easy, we'll find your truck . . .

--------oOo-------

Last September I posted a lengthy item as follows:

A man is at the funeral of an old friend.

He tentatively approaches the deceased's wife and asks whether he can say a word. The widow nods. The man clears his throat and says, "Plethora."

The widow smiles appreciatively. "Thank you," she says. "That means a lot."

Another man comes up and says: "Mind if I say a word too?" She says: "Please do." The man clears his throat and says: "Bargain." The widow replies: "Thanks, that means a great deal."

Another man comes up and asks for the same privilege. The widow thanks him, saying that would be very nice. The man clears his throat and says: "Earth." The widow replies, "Thank you, that means the world."

Another man comes up and asks if he could say a couple words. The widow thanks him, saying that would be very nice. The man clears his throat and says: "Being alive." The widow replies, "Thank you, he would have liked that."

Another man comes up and asks if he could say a word. The widow thanks him, saying that would be very nice. The man clears his throat and says: "Infinity" . The widow replies, "Thank you, that means more than you could possibly imagine."

Another man comes up and asks if he could say a word. The widow thanks him, saying that would be very nice. The man clears his throat and says: "Fhqwhgads". The widow replies: "Thanks, you don't know what that means."

Another man comes up and says: “Mind if I say a few words too?” She says: “Please do.” The man clears his throat and says: “The Mariana Trench.” The widow replies: “Thanks, that’s really deep.”

Another man comes up and says: "Mind if I say a few words too?" She says: "Please do." The man clears his throat and says: "water pit". The widow replies: "Thanks, I know you mean well."

Another man approaches the widow and says: “I’m truly sorry for your loss, he was a great man.” The widow replies: “I’m not sure you understand what’s happening here.”

Since then I have had occasions when I have used one of the above responses in various situations.  Example:

Client: “Thank you very, very much.”
Me:  “That means a lot.”

This came to mind because I came across a slightly different version of the above item which is also worth posting.  I find it humongously amusing, and that means a lot . . .

A guy walks up to the widow at her husband’s funeral and says " May I just say one word?" “Yes,”  she replies. “Plethora." The widow says “Thanks. That means a lot".

A man approaches the widow and says " May I just say a few words?"  “Yes,” she replies. "El mundo." The widow says "Thanks. That would have meant the world to him.

A man approaches the widow and says, "May I just say one word?"  “Yes,” she replies. "Infinity." The widow says, "Thank you. That means more than you know."

A man approaches the widow and says "May I just say one word?" "Yes,” she replies. "Discount." The widow says, "Thank you. That means a great deal."

Another asks to say a couple words, and the widow agrees. "Not dying." The widow tells him "Thank you, he would have liked that."

Another asks to say a word, and the widow agrees. "Glortnushpre." The widow tells him "Thank you, you have no idea what that means."

A man approaches the widow and says "May I just say a few words?" "Yes,” she replies. "Ghost elevator." The widow says, "Thank you. That really lifts my spirits"

A man approaches the widow and says "May I just say one word?  But you'd probably think I'm condescending."  "And what's that?"  "It's when you talk down to someone.”

--------oOo-------

Call me a racist if you want, but south of the border is a sea of violence, corruption and stupidity I wouldn't touch with a ten foot pole.

I am thankful every day that I live in Canada.

--------oOo-------

Two women were playing golf

The first woman teed off and watched in horror as her ball headed directly toward a foursome of men playing the next hole.

The ball hit one of the men. He immediately clasped his hands together at his groin, fell to the ground and proceeded to roll around in agony.

The woman rushed down to the man, and immediately began to apologize. 'Please allow me to help. I'm a Physical Therapist and I know I could relieve your pain if you'd allow me,' she told him.

'Oh, no, I'll be all right. I'll be fine in a few minutes,' the man replied. He was in obvious agony, lying in the foetal position, still clasping his hands at his groin.

At her persistence, however, he finally allowed her to help. She gently took his hands away and laid them to the side, loosened his pants and put her hands slowly and carefully inside. She then administered a tender and skilful massage for several long moments and softly asked 'How does that feel'?

“Feels wonderful,” he replied, “but I still think my thumb's broken!”

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FROM THE VAULT . . .

A limerick from Bytes January 11. 2013:

The bustard's an exquisite fowl
With plenty of reason to howl.
He escapes what would be
Illegitimacy
By grace of a fortunate vowel.

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LIMERICK OF THE WEEK . . .

A limerick with a difference in that instead of an AABBA rhyming pattern it uses AAAAB, without a rhyme at the end and by repeating the words that do rhyme:

There was a young fellow named Perkin
Who was always jerkin' his gherkin.
His wife said, "Now, Perkin,
Stop jerkin' your gherkin:
You're shirkin' your ferkin'---you bastard!"

------😊😊😊----

GALLERY . . .


UK street artist Banksy created the above Christmas mural in Birmingham on December 10, 2019.  The mural highlights homelessness, especially sad at Christmas, and is called “God Bless Birmingham.”

The two reindeer gained red noses in the hours after the mural was unveiled. Authorities placed a sheet of perspex over it and added a protective fence to prevent any further damage.











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CORN CORNER:

--------oOo-------

I rear-ended a car this morning...the start of a REALLY bad day!

The driver got out of the other car, and he was a DWARF!!

He looked up at me and said 'I am NOT Happy!'

So I said, 'Well, which one ARE you then?'

That's how the fight started.

--------oOo-------

Why do seagulls fly over the sea?

Because if they flew over the bay they'd be Bagels.

--------oOo-------

A woman locked her car key in her car, so she asked a passerby for help. The passerby took off his pants, rolled it into a ball and rubbed it on the car door. The car door springs open. Amazed, the woman asked the passerby how did he do it, to which he replied: . . .
"It's simple, these are khaki pants"

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Thursday, January 2, 2020

Thought for the Day



I read the news today, oh boy . . .


--------oOo-------

Antiques Roadshow Expert TIFU:

December 31, 2019
news.com

An Antiques Roadshow expert was left red-faced after he drank a 150-year-old bottle of port – only to discover it was filled with urine and rusty nails. Glass specialist Andy McConnell drew gasps from the show’s audience when he plunged a syringe in the bottle’s cork, which dated back to the 1840s.

Owner John brought the mystery tipple with him to the roadshow in Trelissick, Cornwall, in 2016 after finding it buried in the threshold of his house. But even he was taken aback when expert Andy tasted some of the dirty liquid despite remarking beforehand: “It’s very brown.  I think it’s port – port or red wine … or it’s full of rusty old nails and that’s rust,” he said, clearly repulsed by the taste.



And it has since emerged that Andy was right – about the rust that is. 

Speaking to host Fiona Bruce in a recent episode of the long-running BBC show, Andy and John found out that the bottle was filled with human urine along with other unsavoury items such as a human hair. It transpired, much to the expert’s embarrassment, that the disgusting concoction was put into the house’s threshold as a way of warding off witches. “Inside were these brass pins, all of these dating from the late 1840s and the liquid — urine, a tiny pit of alcohol and one human hair,” Fiona explained.

“And a mysterious little creature called an ostracod, which is like a little cockle. So this was not a bottle of port or wine but a witch’s bottle buried in the threshold of the house as a talisman against witchcraft, against curses, against misfortune coming into the home. So you glad you tried it?”

Taking the news in good spirits, Andy replied: “It was too much of a good opportunity to miss.”

--------oOo-------

McDonalds to the rescue:

December 30, 2019
Huffington Post

A woman being held by her partner who was threatening to kill her, was with the man when they drove through the McDonalds drive-thru in Lodi, California.  After mouthing “Help me” to the McDonalds attendant, staff caused the drive thru traffic to be held up, allowing police to arrive and arrest the captor. 

The restaurant is a participant in the “Safe Place” initiative, which provides training to employees in designated locations to assist vulnerable people in need of immediate help and safety.


--------oOo-------

Street Art ScoMo fundraising:

December 31, 2019
news.com

Australia’s on fire.  Our glorious leader Scott Morrison has been conspicuous by doing other than leading, notably holidaying for Christmas in Hawaii until public criticism forced him home, bathing on Bondi Beach and hosting a social function at Kirribilli House (the PM’s Sydney residence) to watch the fireworks over Sydney Harbour, all the while saying that discussion about emissions and climate change will happen later. 

Scomo’s Hawaiian sojourn inspired Oz artist Scott Marsh to paint a Christmas Eve mural on a wall in Chippendale, an inner city suburb of Sydney, showing The Scomo wearing a Hawaiian shirt, lei and a Santa hat while holding a fancy cocktail.  Behind the Prime Minister large flames burn, and a speech bubble depicts the words “Merry crisis”.


The mural was painted over four days later.  Marsh said he wasn’t sure if the man seen painting over the mural with a roller was a local resident, a concerned citizen or a council worker.


Funds raised from sales of merchandise associated with the mural, including T shirts that were printed for free, had exceeded $60,000, all of which he is donating to the NSW Rural Fire Service (who are all volunteers and which is the largest volunteer fire service in the world).   

--------oOo-------

Goodbye to car mirrors:

December 31, 2019
news.com

Hi-tech digital mirrors will reach Australian roads in 2020, replacing conventional glass with sophisticated camera displays.  Audi’s e-tron electric SUV will replace side mirrors with cameras when it arrives locally next year, joined by the likes of McLaren’s Speedtail supercar and even Mercedes-Benz Actros trucks.

Audi’s e-tron combines high-definition cameras with digital screens mounted near its doorhandles.

Roof-mounted cameras linked to digital displays on the windscreen frame of trucks free up the driver’s forward and directional vision, while being less susceptible to dirt and grime.  The system has a special mode for reversing and uses AI to detect whether there may be a problem with the trailers — it will alert the driver if the length of a vehicle changes. Drivers sleeping in the cab overnight can access camera feeds remotely to check whether potential thieves are interfering with its cargo. Testers say the technology contributes to a noticeable reduction in fuel consumption.

Mirrorless tech is expected to change the way we drive, that what has been a feature on cars for more than a hundred years could be made obsolete by the new technology as makers chase improved efficiency and safety.

--------oOo-------

British foreign aid to China and India:

Daily Mail
December 31, 2019

Boris Johnson is being urged to overhaul Britain's foreign aid system after it emerged £151million was sent to China and India last year, even though they are both rich enough to fund their own space programmes.

Figures show foreign aid spending on China and India rose 12 per cent in a year and that more than a fifth of the foreign aid budget is now spent by Whitehall ministries.  Taxpayer money has even gone on one scheme to find if yoga can halt diabetes.

The figures show that the top recipients of UK aid in 2018 were Pakistan, which received £331million, Ethiopia, which took £301million and Nigeria, which got £297million.

Spending in China rose by £11.7million to reach £55.6million in 2018 and in India it went up by £4.9million to £95million. This is despite both countries embarking on active space programmes.  In January, China became the first country to land a robotic spacecraft on the far side of the Moon as part of its drive to become a leading power in space exploration. It also wants to send astronauts to the Moon and is planning to launch a space station.

India spent £107.8million this summer on launching its lunar probe, Chandrayaan-2. It even has its own foreign aid programme, which gave away £620million last year.

--------oOo-------

Canberra No 1 in the world, but not a good thing:

January 1, 2019
Canberra Times

By midday on January 1, the air quality in Canberra reached a level more than 20 times above hazardous and the recorded index rating was higher than the world's most polluted cities.

The dense smoke haze engulfed Canberra on Tuesday night from fires burning at the South Coast.  Canberra cancelled its proposed New Year's Eve fireworks display.

Acting chief health officer Dr Paul Dugdale said on New Year's Day the capital experienced the worst air quality conditions since ratings began to be measured 15 years ago.  Dr Dugdale said there were a dozen presentations to Canberra Hospital in the 24 hours to noon on Wednesday for smoke-related conditions.

Winds have been forecast to push more smoke into Canberra.

Message to my father in law, Noel:

Stay inside, Noel, don’t go to the plaza and don’t do anything strenuous.

The War Memorial barely visible from a thick smoke haze that has impacted Canberra.

Thick smoke haze in Civic on New Year's Day.

Parliament House

Parliament House can only just be made out.

Another view of Parliament House.





Wednesday, January 1, 2020

QUOTE FOR THE DAY

o-----oOo-----o


A happy New Year to Byters, readers, friends and relatives - 
may the coming year be  the best one yet for you.