Another Friday, folks.
Looking up something the other day I came across some pics of Barbie Doll heads used in imaginative ways. Here's one:
Another, this time with Ken and Blaine . . .
So today’s theme is Barbie.
No, not that Barbie.
One day a father gets out of work and on his way home he suddenly remembers that it's his daughter's birthday.
He pulls over to a Toy Shop and asks the sales person, "How much for one of those Barbie's in the display window?"
The salesperson answers, "Which one do you mean, Sir?
We have: Work Out Barbie for $19.95, Shopping Barbie for $19.95, Beach Barbie for $19.95, Disco Barbie for $19.95, Ballerina Barbie for $19.95, Astronaut Barbie for $19.95, Skater Barbie for $19.95, and Divorced Barbie for $265.95".
The amazed father asks: "It's what?! Why is the Divorced Barbie $265.95 and the others only $19.95?"
The annoyed salesperson rolls her eyes, sighs, and answers: "Sir..., Divorced Barbie comes with: Ken's Car, Ken's House, Ken's Boat, Ken's Furniture, Ken's Computer, one of Ken's Friends, and a key chain made with Ken's balls.
They're bringing out a new Barbie doll called "Internet Barbie", which is really a fat guy claiming to be a hot blonde.
After months of putting up with my daughter's begging I've finally agreed that she can have a barbie for Christmas.
I prefer a traditional turkey roast myself, but it will be worth it to see the smile on her little face when I put those flame grilled sausages on her plate.
An Australian barbie . . .
An English guy relocates to the outback in Australia.
He'd been living there a few days, when the phone rang.
He answered the phone and the guy on the other end introduced himself as his neighbour, he told him he lived on a smallholding 50 miles away and would like to welcome him to Australia.
The neighbour then said, "Why don't you drop by on Saturday at about 7.30 for a real Australian barbie?"
"Yes, I'd like that", said the Englishman, "But what's a real Australian barbie?"
The Aussie said, "Well, we eat as much as we want, drink as much of the amber brew as we want and have as much sex as we want".
"The Englishman said, "Sounds great, what's the dress code?"
"The Aussie said, "Wear what you like mate, there'll only be the two of us".
The following was sent to me in an email by Leo M. It is not a Barbie item but it is too good not to post . . .
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A refuse collector in Cairns , Australia is driving along a street picking up the wheelie bins and emptying them into his compactor. He goes to one house where the bin hasn't been left out, and in the spirit of kindness, and after having a quick look about for the bin, he gets out of his truck goes to the front door and knocks. There's no answer. Being a kindly and conscientious bloke, he knocks again - a bit harder and then harder still.
Eventually a Chinese man comes to the door. "Harro!" says the Chinese man. "G’day, mate! Where's ya bin?" asks the collector. "I bin on toiret," explains the Chinese bloke, a bit perplexed.
Realising the fellow had misunderstood him, the bin man smiles and tries again. "No! No! Mate, where's your dust bin?" "I dust been to toiret, I toll you!'' says the Chinese man, still perplexed.
"Listen," says the collector. "You're misunderstanding me. Where's your 'wheelie' bin?'"
"OK, OK." replies the Chinese man with a sheepish grin and whispers in the collector's ear. "I wheelie bin having sex wiffa wife's sista!"
When Princess Di was a youngster, she took Ken and Barbie out of their dreamhouse and set them on fire.
After 20 minutes, the only thing still alight was Barbie's foot.
It seems her Ken doll burned out long before her leg end ever did.